Extreme Fear Essence
I had a strong feeling to share our Extreme Fear Essence. As I was reading through the Essence reading, it offers us an in-depth understanding of the root of Extreme fear. All of our Essences are tools to enable us to work through fears and associated issues. Each Essence is chosen by our higher self to help us to start dissolving a particular group of fears – I say group as there many layers to fear and its intertwined issues. This, of course, takes time, although there may be times when things unfold quickly. It feels like a perfect time to share this Essence, and it’s guidance when there is a lot of uncertainty, fear and anxiety coming up. I certainly notice a lot of deep emotions coming up within myself as the days and weeks unfold. Some are very uncomfortable and intense. Some appear very subtle others have been difficult to navigate or recognise; they have been there for so long and play out through many disguises. It is quite amazing how our fears will try to hold on so firmly. One thing we can be reassured of is there is a loving part of us, and that will guide us through our challenges into calmer waters if we allow it too.
Can and our current circumstances trigger deep emotions of fear?
My attention is focused on the language/terms being used to convey the coronavirus and any guidelines we have to follow such as – social distancing, socially isolating one’s self, as global pandemic and lockdown. How we communicate with each other has also changed almost overnight, life as we know it has radically changed and there is nothing, we can do about most of it. Of course, this is proving disconcerting for us, whereby we feel separate and not in control – of our own lives. So much is triggering us -even a simple trip the shops can prove very interesting indeed.
An interesting essential shopping trip!
Earlier today I went for some essential shopping to our local village shops. I also had to go to the pharmacy. I set off on the short journey to my local shops. When I arrived, I found the shops had implemented restrictions overnight, which was a bit of a shock to see. I saw a few people were wearing masks, (up until now I had only seen this on the news) and surgical gloves- some workmen had heavy-duty red masks that almost covered their face, somehow all this felt quite scary. It felt like I had stepped into a sci-fi movie or a nightmare. Up until now had not felt overly anxious about the coronavirus, so I was unprepared for the anxiety I felt creep in. My first reaction was to run out of the shop and get away from anyone remotely near me. There were so many emotions coming and going. I felt sadness for the people around me. This sadness quickly morphed into feeling helpless that I couldn’t make all this go away for them. I then felt anger come up at that point I couldn’t identify where all these feelings were coming from, I thought, oh my goodness I’m going to have a meltdown in the middle of a shop. I got my bits of shopping and left glad to be outside in the beautiful sunshine where everything seemed calm and refreshing. My next stop was the chemist which I found to be locked and only allowing two people in at a time. That’s when it struck me that we are in an unusual situation all over the world. It’s not I hadn’t thought about it until today, I just had not allowed it to impact me mentally or emotionally. Once I was in the chemist, it was the same chemist I usually get my toiletries and things I need, but it felt somewhat different today – the energy felt different it felt heavy and dense.
The only lights on were at the front desk where the pharmacist was busy doing his work. The cheerful assistants seemed strained but helpful as always. I started to feel the sadness again that I had felt in the other shop; at the same time, I felt gratitude and respect that they were still offering a service under these extreme circumstances. I had medication to collect, and they said they couldn’t do it do for at least two weeks. The assistant shared that they had a two-week backlog of prescriptions not dispensed yet because they didn’t have the medicines or the time to make up the prescriptions. The pharmacist overheard our conversation and said to come back and 5 pm, and he would have some of my medication for me. He didn’t have to do that, and I was grateful for his kindness.
I said my goodbyes, and left the chemist feeling a bit confused from my overall experience. Once I was at home as we Brits do when in a crisis – we make a nice cup of tea lol. As I sat with my tea, trying to reflect on my experience, my anxiety started to fade a little. In my mind, I observed the scenes in the shops, the people with masks, the red taped squares distancing shoppers to keep them safe. For all I was home, in my comfortable, cosy flat didn’t I feel safe. I was questioning, what was I feeling? & What had just happened to me out there? The anxiety had occurred without warning. As I looked a bit deeper at what was happening, I started to understand to see it didn’t come from the people wearing scary-looking masks or all the restrictions I felt in shops or from feeling vulnerable being outside my comfort zone.
It was becoming clear what was causing this anxiety; it was a reflection of my own fears. The scary masks, surgical gloves and restricted feelings we’re showing me where I hide or socially isolate myself long before this current situation, imposed it. In many ways, I have been in a prison of my own mind where I think I ‘am secure—fearing to step out into the world. For example, I have used every distraction to avoid doing my things, feeling that it is too scary, that I am not good enough or don’t know enough etc. This prison is the ’nightmare’ so, the mask represents me covering things up, not wanting to see what is there, and trying to run away from fears by isolating myself from those I know can help me work through these issues. I learned today that I even distance myself from that which can support me. So, going out today may have seemed like a trip to the shops – but I felt I was on a battlefield, and in a way, I was. This fear I experience may be rooted in the past, but it certainly feels like it is happening now, It comes from years of conditioning which have turned into self-beliefs into deep-rooted fears.
“Extreme Fear is designed to help you see Truth. When you are overcome by fear it is telling you that something needs addressing. Something needs to be looked at within the deepest parts of you. When you are ready to look, all you have to do is allow the fear to show itself, then you will find that you can experience the energy of the fear. If you do not turn away from the fear and avoid it, then the courage will activate and help to dissolve the fear”. Extract from The Extreme Fear Essence
What is fear? What is fear made of?
Later that evening, I joined Tim Dyson and others online for an Emerald Heart Gathering he was hosting. We did a grounding meditation. In our meditation, we explored fear, and we asked any fear that came up – what are you and what are you made of? I thought to myself; this is very interesting as it reflected the earlier events of my day. I could still feel the fear from earlier, in our meditation when I felt into it and asked the fear – who you are and what is made of? What came back was brief and straightforward. “I am your conditioned thoughts, but I have no real substance.” So, from that, I understood fear is a not physical entity; it’s a collection of thoughts turned into a belief system which them becomes a fear of something. The more we believe the fear, the deeper it is rooted in our mind and our heart.
I learned it wasn’t so much the virus (the fear could have been anything) I was scared of; it was the thought of it and what I was reading that was contributing. It’s difficult to make rational decisions when anxiety is active. And I had allowed my mind to go into fight or flight mode which disconnects me from I am my inner guidance. I wasn’t listening; I was only ‘reacting’. When this happens, I step into a place of uncertainty, and things escalate very quickly, and I lose perspective of what is happening. My response is to get to a place of safety as soon as l can. Anyone reading this who has these episodes of anxiety will understand how this feels. I started eagerly to write this blog last week not because anyone asked me too, but because I felt strongly guided to. All was flowing well I felt anxiety coming up around completing this. I can strongly feel the fear and confusion as I am writing, which is the norm when I choose to write something I know others will read. When the anxiety starts I can’t even see the text in front of me, and nothing makes sense everything is a just a jumbled up mess as I try to process My reaction when this happens can be to give up, but there is a part of me that continues to encourage me saying, that it is not an option to give up, and you will be able to do this.
I then proceed to get even more anxious and more confused, and I start to physically shake and feel nauseous due to the anxiety/fear. I start to ‘think’ who wants to know what you have to say anyway? It won’t make sense so that no one will understand it. Such is the power of my conditioning and also a difficulty called dyspraxia I was diagnosed with. But I have always asked where the real problem is? And I question if most of it is also rooted in fear? So even as I write this, I am being encouraged to look deeper at where the concern is and what it is made of? Is it fear of writing, or is it fear of sharing what I have to share? As I shared earlier in this article, there are many layers of fears that link to each other. I notice using our Essences, and Emerald Heart Light has brought things to the surface that have troubled me for so long, but eventually, The Light unfolds things in a way that I can understand the truth of what I need to see.
“When you are ready to look, all you have to do is allow the fear to show itself, then you will find that you can experience the energy of the fear. If you do not turn away from the fear and avoid it, then the courage will activate and help to dissolve the fear”. Extract from The Extreme Fear Essence
Much Love and Blessings to you all.