In this frank and honest article, Emerald Heart Elder, Yvonne Hrdy, shares with the Blog, her feelings and insights surrounding Easter.
Yvonne travels back into childhood to comment on formative experiences concerning religious conditioning and how she was able to break free from the control associated with this.
Every year as we approach the Easter days I feel a strong need to go into silence, take some time for contemplation.
There is on one side a great sense of activity and the vital and uplifting spring energies as support to get done with my stuff and go on with my job. And this year the energies and nature seem ratherto explode in a sheer breath-taking way, that pulls everything with it, if you want it or not.
On the other side, as I said, I feel a need to go into silence, reduce my communication to the most essential things. The Easter days are one of the most sacred days for me and to look at the path of this great teacher, Jesus, and his tremendous gift for humanity brings me to tears each year. In his Light everything seems so trivial and all this chatter in the world sometimes becomes unbearable. Now, this does not mean that we have to turn into ascetic, deadly serious monks or nuns, but well, a bit of focus on what is really important won’t harm. Even in those years when I was still a child or later as teenager where for sure I had no sense for ‘spirituality’ those days were sacred to me.
A big shift happened when I was 9 years old. I was raised in a catholic environment and at that age you receive the Sacrament of the Holy Communion at church, usually on the first Sunday after Easter. You are being prepared for almost one year via regular religious teachings at school in order to become a better human being through following the Ten Commandments as interpreted by the church and in order to become ‘worthy’ to go into communion or reunion with Jesus, symbolized by the vine and the host, transformed with the help of the priest by the power of the Holy Spirit into the essence of the Saviour, Jesus Christ.
I took this very seriously. It was a sacred thing for me and I felt like I was becoming the bride of Jesus. However, already during the preparation time, where you were asked to confess your ‘sins’ I felt some big resistance rising. Of course, one should not murder people or steal or something like that, but I felt I had to confess some stupid things which did not feel wrong at all, just because I was being told to do so. Who were these people to judge me? But otherwise I would end up in hell or at least in the infinite purgatory and not being ‘worthy’ anyway of the grace of God.
Something felt utterly wrong and in total contradiction to my inner calling and to the voice in my heart and you can imagine how much confusion this created in a 9-year old girl. You can’t really express it and when I tried or my resistance came out, I was told off badly by the nuns who were our teachers. How could I dare to doubt any of it.
Nevertheless, I was elected amongst around 120 pupils to read a lecture during the church service on that special day. During or shortly after this event some sort of inner realization must have taken place. I had totally forgotten about this event until Dave had asked me during our first consultation, if I had some memory about my first deep spiritual experience. I was in awe and shock at the same time when I remembered that I must have stood there in front of 600 people to read a teaching – I don’t remember any of the details. But according to my parents apparently did very well, standingthere, fully centred and in my power. The only thing I recalled though was this shift of inner knowing that happened. A knowing that something was not true of what was being told to us, followed by disappointment, confusion and rage. There was disappointment because when I received the holy host I felt emptiness. It did not feel at all like it should feel. There was also rage that increased over the years. Only later could Iput it in words. Some thingseven took time until only a few years ago: rage about how the teachings were adapted throughout the centuries to be used for politics, to keep people in fear and under control and above all the elimination of the Feminine, be it the honouring of the Feminine and the Mother or the elimination of the role of the women or how this was presented in some very distorted ways.
Only a few weeks after this event we, the communicants, were asked to show up again in our nice dresses to take part in a procession on Christ’s Ascension Day and I refused to participate, this was not my business anymore. I invented some sort of disease during the event in order to have an excuse. But only for these few hours, of course. Just before lunch I experienced a ‘miraculous, spontaneous healing’ and was able to get up again and join my family in the restaurant during this day of festivities 😉
I remained a seeker though and my quest for truth led me quite quickly to the Emerald Heart and to Dave, after my spiritual awakening a number of years ago, when all sort of memories and experiences began to flood my consciousness.
Now I have to laugh every time when I think back and remember that it took me about one and a half years from hearing first about Dave and the Emerald Heart and checking out his website until I finally found the courage to ask for a consultation. Well, I took a few of his Essences of the Period before and believe me, they brought already some deep shifts into my life. So, inside I knew my life would change forever if I’d started to work with this guy and my subconscious created allkinds of excuses and fears to find a reason why it was not ‘the right time yet’ orperhaps a ‘stupid thing’ to do so. At that time I still worked in international business, although I had already started to learn and train with various energy healing methods, mostly because I was told that I seriously had to look for a spiritual teacher after my awakening, which was accompanied by some intense kundalini experiences for a while.
Well, when the student is ready, the teacher appears and now I can’t believe why I waited for so longbecause, as soon as I was in touch with this Light I knew deeply inside this was what I had been looking for. And with the help and guidance of Dave and through his wisdom and experience I felt, I would finally move forward at a much deeper level than ever before. A deep relief came into my system and when Dave asked at the end of the first consultation if I was ‘ready to receive’ and the Light was poured into me I could not believe my luck. I drank it in, I could not get enough and I was in tears of bliss. Well, the next appointment was the polar opposite: I was full of self-denial of all my fears and the Guidance almost refused to continue to work with me if I’d not get over this.This triggered all my unworthiness and mechanisms of self-destruction to the extreme. I had an auto-immune disease at this time and could literally see how I or my immune system attacked itself, completely out of control and it was a moment where I truly had to make a choice for life or death. You learn however, over time and with the help of the Light to dissolve bit by bit of these patterns and gain control over your life and use your life force in a constructive way, as we are meant to do.
Why am I writing all this? Well, maybe my words will help you to remember as well and maybe, if you need to, find the courage to take the next step on YOUR journey.
The time is always upon us when we chose it to be and when we find the courage to seek God or seek the truth, which is basically the same thing, with all our heart; it is upon us when we have the courage to reach out and take action for what our heart is telling us.
I feel though that this month of April is a very special time and great opportunity which won’t be given at this speed again. This year’s Easter Days are flanked by two powerful lunar eclipses; first by a Total Lunar Eclipse on 15th of April, on Full Moon Day, which shall be visible on the ‘pacific side of the globe’ in Australia, New Zealand and North and South America. The second is a New Moon Eclipse on April 29th.
I am neither an expert in channeling moon energies nor an astrologer, but I feel a deep sense of importance and excitement about the combination of these events. Astrologers say that there is even more going on, just after the Easter days, but I leave this up to the experts. In some prophecies the first eclipse is being called the start of the ‘end of the days of the Lord’ with a series of more full moon eclipses following in a period of one year or so. Well, we know now that the world is not going to end, but this is for sure a time where we will experience another shift of the new consciousness arriving here on Earth, like a final landing taking place. And I think it is no coincidence that Lynne and Dave have been launching the – Divine Plan- Healing System in exactly this period of time, with the first series of training taking place now in Europe. A healing system where you can find a perfect combination of Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine energies in service for the healing and wholing of humanity.
This is the time of precious Divine Feminine energies re-emerging, but in a new way like the world will never have seen before
I have come to peace with the church, its history and representatives. When you allow the Divine to enter your life you learn, step by step, to FEEL it all, to see it all and learn to accept life in its fullness, knowing that everything is Divine. You learn to see the Divine Spark in everybody and everything, just as Jesus has told us, as we are all Children of the Lord and truly One at the level of consciousness. And as long as there will be some darkness in me, there will be darkness in the world and vice versa, unless you have not mastered life over death completely or freed yourself from all karma and know how to walk on water.
Divine Perfection and the Power of the Divine Feminine
There is a sense of Divine Perfection in the air. Not as a mental concept, but as reality. Surrender to what is. Don’t fight anything back, let it all happen, let it enter your system, become undefended, learn to feel it all, do neither fight back, nor justify but let it all in. Be Receptive. Receiving it all. Let it touch your core, undefended. Stand still in your truth, in the infinite, calm the ocean of your true essence and then observe how all energies that are in turmoil or distorted, be it within or without, merge again with the great ocean when they are not fed by attention or any other energies. They will be absorbed and are thus being transformed into light and love again. This is the power of the Divine Feminine. It is infinite. Just take it all in, receive it, undefended, not attached to anything and let it all be transformed. There is nothing you have to do. Then you are able to take the next step towards love again.
One day on my journey, it is now 2-3 years or so since I sat in meditation and suddenly had a strong vision of Jesus who said “Eventually it all comes down to the Divine Mother.” He continued by giving me instructions that “no matter what was going to happen now, hold on to the Divine Mother. Don’t let her go, trust and hold on to her by all means. That is all what you need to do.”
I was then being taken on a journey into darkness. I had to dive ever so deeply into my own darkness and that of the history of mankind, which was one and the same thing. I was taken through all kinds of cruelty thatmen and women have ever done to each other, the physical abuse by men to women, emotional abuse by women towards men, all kinds of betrayal and much more. I could see the Light above me at all times but I knew when I gave up I would have failed myself and I would have failed Jesus. It was horrible. My body felt like a raw, wounded piece of flesh, the upper part of my body partly merged with Christ, the lower part of my body a raw and bleeding womb, ripped open, torn into pieces. I lost consciousness a few times, I could not walk anymore and had to crawl to the toilet, I think it took about two days, on and off, but I did not give up and went deeper and deeper. Eventually I came out at a point which felt like the beginning of history, when Oneness separated into the Masculine and Feminine in the form of a Vesica Piscis. I could sense some sort of original wound after this separation, a betrayal by the feminine towards the masculine, but at the same time I felt like I had accessed and was being anchored or re-connected to what I would call the Heart of the Great or Primordial Mother. This anchor now feels like a – hopefully – infinite, but really great source of strength to me. In those moments however, it was traumatic, as I started to see a number of things that were about to being created. For example I started to see the later formation of the Wheel of Light and who would be part of it and a number of things, but I clearly chose to opt out and forget.
This may sound all dramatic, but this was only a tiny step of transformation and a tiny tip I caught of what is possible with the power of the Divine Mother, especially in the eye of the Path Jesus had taken on for humanity. He, for me, is an example, to having surrendered completely to the forces of the Divine Mother. With the help and support of the women around him, he had learnt to surrender to the Feminine, become completely undefended, stand in his truth, vulnerable, with an open heart and was able to ‘turn the other cheek’ no matter what life presented to him. By surrendering his life to the Mother, which is life itself in all its expression, he mastered life beyond death and gave us his tremendous gift. He probably helped to rescue the Divine Feminine in those dark times of imbalance, far ahead of the consciousness of that time.
This is, admittedly, a very personal view and most probably very limited understanding of this great teacher and of course, there is so much more that could be said. But hopefully my words can convey at least a minimum of the gratitude and humility, the reverence and respect that this great soul deserves, already for simply having touched the Earth with his feet.
I wish you a great Easter time and that you celebrate the coming days in a way thatnurtures your soul and allows your heart rejoice.
With deep Blessings and Love,
Elder of the Emerald Heart