Emerald Heart Practitioner Jack Childs, shares with the Blog his understanding of pain and what we can do to change our relationship with it and move forward.
Every human being who has incarnated onto Earth has to deal with pain, whether on a physical, emotional, mental, energetic or spiritual level. Pain from ill health, in intimate relationships, from the abuse of others, from the energy of others, at the suffering of humanity and much more. For those on a spiritual path pain must be fully felt and dealt with, yet most run away from it for the entirety of the lives.
For the entirety of my teenage years and my early 20s I ran away from the enormous pain I felt, as I perceived it was too much to bear. Too much to deal with all the digestive distress, all the pain I felt in intimate relationships, all the feelings of not being good enough, all the pain of being different from my peers and all the pain I felt for the suffering of others around me. Luckily for me the pain became so bad that I surrendered my egoic need to walk the path alone and reached out for help with my Emerald Heart Mentor (Tim Dyson).
I can’t say working with the Emerald Heart Light made things less painful. It actually made things a lot more painful in the beginning because it illuminated what I had been suppressing, but what it certainly did do was change my relationship with pain and help me move forward massively in my life. Dormant gifts started to be brought to the surface, my outer life changed beyond all proportion and I started to feel a lot more peace within. Now I don’t pretend to be an expert on how to work through pain, but I do feel I have picked up some useful points from working through it on my own path and helping clients work through their own pain as well.
Number one is that you must be aware of the common suppression techniques you use to avoid your pain. They come in the form of what I call PND (Projection, Numbing and Denial). In projection we project our own inner pain onto other people, whether it be in the form of blame, judgement, criticism or heroism. Think all those over the top vegans, environmental activists and feminists trying to change the world or the person who blames their parents, spouse or boss for the state of their life. In numbing we use alcohol, drugs, fast food, excessive exercise, keeping very busy and many other things to close our deeper feelings and take us out of the pain. In denial we are so closed that we just deny the possibility that there is any pain inside of us and instead play the old social façade of “all is fine with me”. All these forms of suppression link into one another and I am sure you will be able to recognise the common ways you try to suppress you own pain. It is important to remember we are all human and not to beat yourself up for suppressing things, but at the same time try to more forward a little. To face all the pain inside of us is a process and something which even advanced spiritual practitioners will struggle with.
The second useful point is that because of a tendency to suppress it becomes very important to have a daily practice dedicated to open a space for you to feel any pain that needs to be there. Note the words “open a space” very carefully, as I am no way advising you to force the pain up or take a machoistic perspective to pain. Instead we are simply allowing a space within us for all things to come up, whether that be joy, bliss, happiness, despair, anger or pain. This daily practice may take the form of a conscious walk in nature/yoga/Qi-Gong/Tai-Chi/meditation. The key is not just to have one of these practices but the intention you enter them with, as most people limit their transformative potential from their internal positions. If we want to use them to deeply support our spiritual development we must take the inner posture that all emotions (including the most difficult pain) are welcome in them, gently allowing ourselves to feel and explore them during the practice.
Lastly it is so vital to reach out for help when we are going through pain or perceive there is pain that we are too scared to look at. I see so many people time and time again going through pain with this deluded heroic perspective that they must face it all alone or that if they give all their love to others then this will heal the pain inside of them. Sometimes I introduce people to my work and the Emerald Heart Light if it feels right, but few have the courage, vision and real love for humanity to use it as a method to face their pain. And pain is always painful not simply because it feels shit, but because ever time we really face some deep pain inside of us an aspect of who we think we are must die and the next best version of ourselves must come into the world. Working with the Emerald Heart Light may or may not be the help needed at this time, but you can’t ignore this fundamental need to reach out for help if you want to move forward in your life.
By implementing the three above points into our everyday life, you may be lucky enough to discover the most remarkable bliss at the heart of pain. Bliss is a term thrown about a lot in spiritual circles (there were certainly some interesting definitions on my recent yoga teacher training course), but just to be clear I mean real bliss. A feeling of being at one with everything, a deep peace and a feeling so deep that you can’t put it into words. In my experience this bliss can come in two forms. It can come as a “heaven bliss” (where we have the most illuminating experience from tapping into someone’s light) or it can come in the form of what I call “earth bliss” (where it comes from sitting very deeply with pain).
For me the most intense “heaven bliss” has come in Darshans with David Ashworth, consultations with Tim or in some of my own consultations with clients. They feel very deep, awe inspiring in their intensity and often are profound experiences. Yet none are as deep as some of the more recent bliss I have experienced through sitting very deeply with horrific pain. This bliss feels more subtle, more grounded and in many ways rooted in something much deeper. The “heaven bliss” is really you getting all high and blissful from someone else’s light, whilst the “earth bliss” feels a lot more like a transformation of your own darkness into light. Although you may initially think that it is more important to get help from others to get the “heavenly bliss”, support is actually more vital for the “earth bliss”. Without Tim’s loving support and guidance using the Emerald Heart Tools there is no chance I would have been able to face the pain deeply enough to allow it to be transformed into bliss and move forward massively with my life.
So I invite you to use the light within these words as a mirror to look deeply into your own pain, suppression techniques and whether you need to reach out for some help. I feel to really go deeper on the path we need to have the courage to sit with the pain enough for the “earth bliss” to naturally occur. We all love being lit up and having these profound experiences, but we struggle to sit with the pain at a deep enough level to allow this more subtle form of bliss to be expressed through us. Yet by having the courage and right support to do this we let go of the massive limitations we put on our lives by running away from the pain. We see the light in the deepest darkness, the unlimited support in the deepest loneliness and the bliss at the heart of pain.
Love and Blessings,
Although this article has been written in my own words and using my own guidance, I would like to acknowledge the teachings of David Ashworth and Tim Dyson for the ideas, experiences and light behind it. Thank you 😊